Week 5 Twitter Summary

Andrea: “I hate everyone but Mike and Kevin.  I love my wonderful husband, Kevin.  Oops… I mean, Kris.”

Ashley:  “It’s hard being the least liked person in the house. Please vote for me.”

Erica:  “Giving Kevin another shot blew up horribly.  That sucks.”  Erica is awesome and her tweets are awesome.  I want to be Erica when I grow up.

Gene: “I’ve decided to tweet constantly, because it’s way cooler in the Twitter booth than in The Glass House.  I <3 Joy.   #TopTrendingTweets @CelebritiesThatHaveNothingToDoWithThisTweet.”

Holly: “ThistotallyblowsbutI’mgoingtohavetogohomethisweekaasdljfa ;djfkal;djf;asStategyStrategyVoteforMe!adf9a8d[f8asdpadsfasdfasdf asdfadsVoteForMe!SupremeTeamHAHAHAHAHATHATRHYMESIMadeAPoem!!WOO-HOOOOOO!!!asdfasdkjjk;asd…. Seriously, though, vote for me, because I’m screwed.”

Jeffrey:  “Hey, if you’re one of the prior eliminated players, can you ask all your fans to vote for me?  Unless you’re Robin, because I assume you can’t manage that.  Mike and Andrea sucks, Holly is annoying, yay food, and I heart Erica.”

Joy:  Joy actually didn’t send any tweets for seven days (other than the suspicious one below), then mostly threw shout-outs at Playboy and her daughter, then reminded us all that Kevin is a jackass (apparently because something new happened).

There’s something wrong with Joy’s feed, as I can only assume that she didn’t write this Tweet about what an assholes she is.  Seriously, ABC, I am positive that you can find someone who is willing to work for $8/hour and knows how to use Twitter.  My teenage niece is available until classes start in September.

Kevin:  “Huh.  I just realized that there’s this thing called “Twitter” that I can use to communicate with the viewers.  I also just realized that I’m screwed if people don’t start voting for me.  I wonder how I can put these two bits of information together….”

Ori:01001000011000010100100001100001001011100010000000100000010010010010000001101000011000010111011001100101001000000110110101101111011100100110010100100000011001100110111101101100011011000110111101110111011001010111001001110011001000000111010001101000011000010110111000100000011011010110111101110011011101000010000001101111011001100010000001110100011010000110010100100000011000110110111101101110011101000110010101110011011101000110000101101110011101000111001100101110

Mike: “If I pretend to love everyone on TeamAwesome, maybe I won’t be up for Team Captain again next week.  Please ignore everything you see in the videos and live feeds and believe only my tweets.  You are getting very sleepy….”

Stephanie: “Unlike Mike, I’m not lying when I say that I like some of the other players.  And unlike Mike, I don’t think the viewers are a bunch of mindless assholes.  Also unlike Mike, I do what the viewers say - Gene and I are the only ones.”  (Ok, I added all of the unlike Mike parts.  She’s not as snotty as I am.)